I don’t know if I am just emotional because of the Father’s Day frenzy or if it’s stress…This evening I read the lyrics to Alexi Murdoch’s song entitled, Song For You, off of his 2002 release, Four Songs…I couldn’t hold back the tears from falling…

I think sometimes I come off as someone who is so confident and comfortable, but the truth is I am not at all. I question everything, and although this is often vital for progression of my being…I often question too much, to the point where it becomes destructive, halts all potential progression. And this is something I have been aware of for quite some time, which then causes me to fear that this is one of those life long lessons…

It is too late or way too early…The simplicity of this song is beautiful. The bare bone honesty resonates in your mind and the gentle melody holds you close…So the lyrics and the song:

So today I wrote a song for you
Cause a day can get so long
And I know its hard to make it through
When you say there’s something wrong

So I’m trying to put it right
Cause I want to love you with my heart
All this trying has made me tight
And I don’t know even where to start

Maybe that’s a start

Cause you know its a simple game
That you play filling up your head with rain
And you know you are hiding from your pain
In the way, in the way you say your name

And I see you
Hiding your face in your hands
Flying so you won’t land
You think no one understands
No one understands

So you hunch your shoulders and you shake your head
And your throat is aching but you swear
No one hurts you, nothing could be sad
Anyway you’re not here enough to care

And you’re so tired you don’t sleep at night
As your heart is trying to mend
You keep it quiet but you think you might
Disappear before the end

And it’s strange that you cannot find
Any strength to even try
To find a voice to speak your mind
When you do, all you wanna do is cry

Well maybe you should cry

And I see you hiding your face in your hands
Talking bout far-away lands
You think no one understands
Listen to my hands

And all of this life
Moves around you
For all that you claim
You’re standing still
You are moving too
You are moving too
You are moving too
I will move you
~Alexi Murdoch, Song For You

mp3: Alexi Murdoch, Song For You (mp3 expired)
Available on Four Songs


4 Responses to “What Brought Tears”

  1. unknown on June 17th, 2006 7:04 am

    Alexi is fast becoming my New Favourtie Singer-Songwriter. And that’s all down to you. Prior to stumbling upon your place of WWW residence I’d never even heard of him or his beautiful songs. A later post from me (forthcoming) has been inspired by hearing him. And from reading your words. So, be strong LovelyBelle. Try and let a few of those questions get away lightly… let them run off in the distance, through the long grass… you can live without them nipping your heels, dragging you down. ~ Colin.

  2. Cinnamon Spider on June 18th, 2006 11:24 am

    Very pretty lyrics.
    I know what you mean by questionning everything. I too do this and I also over-analyse every single detail while perhaps missing the bigger picture. I don’t know.
    Anyway hope you are OK with father’s day

  3. FiL on June 18th, 2006 11:12 pm

    Sigh. Our greatest strengths can prove our most frustrating weaknesses. Many a time I’ve found myself questioning my questioning, leading to truly horrible feedback loops of brooding torpor…

    I’d wager your self-awareness will see you through. Though of course that won’t always ease the stress.

    In recent years I’ve learned the value of making leaps of faith (that’s small-‘f’ faith, not big-‘F’ check-yer-head-at-the-temple-door Faith) when the questioning became counterproductive. It was scary, but oh, so liberating.

    And thanks for the Alexi Murdoch – I agree most happily with Dear Colin’s Drake analogy!


  4. music is art on June 22nd, 2006 2:56 pm

    i know that feeling… that overwhelmingness.. all those analyzations. i go from confident to vulnerable within seconds. and i guess in some way, i keep trying to tell myself that its normal.

    but what is normal really?

    just wanted to say i understand.
    and thankyou for yr personal words

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